In our culture, we are taught there are things in our lives that shouldn't be talked about. Personal finances are one of those things. Debt is a taboo word that no one wants to talk about, and yet, it's something most of us have. When we take on debt, we are confident we can make the monthly payments. Then something unexpected happens, for example,  loss of a job, or in my case, the death of a spouse. Monthly bills, home repairs, car repairs and unexpected expenses just keep coming at us and we wonder how to make it through the month. It's a snowball of misery that we are just expected to suffer in silence. Hello anxiety! . I am no longer going to suffer in silence and neither should you. Debt is something most people have.  I am in a pretty big hole that I am going to dig myself out of. I have no choice but to succeed, failure is not an option.

There was a time when I looked forward to paying the monthly bills. I liked seeing the balances on the two credit cards I had going down every month. I was geared to get out of debt and stay out of debt. I developed an OCD about finances. Then life happened. I went from having complete control over my finances to dreading checking my mail or my e-mail when the monthly bills started coming in, seemingly over night. It got to the point that I just didn't want to open any bills. Avoidance is never a good thing when dealing with debt and I know better. But, there I was, avoiding the financial disaster that was looming ahead like a pro. Now, is the time to work towards getting back on track. This blog is to keep me accountable.

In August, I received  a letter from my insurance company that detailed items that needed attention to my house and on my property. Most of the items on the list weren't a big deal. My husband had a stroke last summer which left him paralyzed on his left side from the waist down. A few months after his stroke, he passed away from a heart attack. As I read the list of items that needed taken care of, I was confident that I could take care of most of them by myself or have friends help me. Then I saw that on the list was a new roof. The quote I received for the roof was $10,000. That was an insurmountable road block that I didn't know where to start. So I did the one thing that no one should ever do. I feel into a mild depression and ignored it for a few months. 

If that wasn't bad enough, I have two sump pumps in my basement that quit working at the same time. My husband always took care of the sump pumps and I didn't have anyone to give me a hand. What did I do? Yep, you guessed it, ignored it for the first day or two, until I realized that pretty soon the water in the basement was going to reach my furnace. Thinking about the cost of the roof, I knew I had to do something. I posted on a local FB page for my community asking if anyone knew a handy man. I received two good referrals. I called the one who came highly recommended. He came out and gave me quote for $1,000. His suggestion was to purchase two new sump pumps with a higher horsepower to compensate for the amount of water that they had to pump. I had to use some of the funds that were supposed to go to my mortgage payment. But, what choice did I have? The only choice was to get them fixed. Yeah, that sucked. For a few weeks I just felt like giving up. To much was coming at me to fast.

Two weeks later, I was driving to the store and my car stalled. I started it back up, thinking that it just stalled for some reason. It started a few times, and then wouldn't start at all. I had to pay $120 to get my vehicle towed home just to find out that the timing chain had broken. There was another almost $1200 that I couldn't afford to spend. 

So, here I am, living 30 miles from the nearest city with no running car, facing home repairs that seem insurmountable. I have never been a quitter and I'm not going be quit now. .This blog is to keep me accountable and on track. 




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